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The Bride and Groom

Graham and I met in 1998. He worked full time at a local supermarket where I also worked part time in the weekends. Graham’s family is from New Zealand while mine are from Chile . Our wedding wasn’t just a celebration of our love and our families but also of our cultures…and it all began with the proposal.

The Proposal

The proposal was completely unexpected. Graham had suggested we spend a relaxing weekend together in Taupo. At the time we lived in different cities so I was excited about spending some time together. I was completely oblivious to what Graham had planned, even the flash hotel and bunch of dozen roses didn’t set any bells off!

After dinner Graham suggested a walk down to the lake. Once there, and out of the blue, Graham got down on one knee and asked “Queres casar conmigo?” Graham had asked me to marry him in Spanish! He had asked for my parent’s blessing and had told them he wanted to propose in Spanish so my step-dad wrote it on a piece of paper. Graham carried that piece of paper for several days in his pocket reciting it over and over.

What strikes me about that moment when I look back is that I have never been so overwhelmed with so many emotions at one time, surprise, disbelief, excitement and happiness. It was a once in a lifetime feeling, and I know I’ll never experience that again.

The Planning

Setting the Date and the venues

When setting the date we knew we wanted the wedding to be in Summer and we thought it would be nice to have it around the time of the year that we got engaged, which was in January. Our wedding date ended up being dictated by the availability of our choice of venue for the wedding reception, despite booking over a year in advance!

The Church

We always knew we wanted the ceremony to be held at a quaint old church at the bottom of a valley just outside of Palmerston North.

The church was built in 1895 and seats approximately 80 people. We loved the intimacy of it and the look of the old wooden church.

The Reception Venue

Unfortunately venues weren’t finalised without there being a couple of hiccups. We had booked our photos at a venue which was conveniently across the road from the church where the ceremony was being held. However, the owners of the property ended up selling the property approximately two months prior to the wedding and the new owners did not want to carry on the wedding and B&B business. Thankfully, when the owners advised us of the sale they recommended another property which was a bit further down the road. When we went to view the alternative venue Graham and I thought it was also a beautiful property and booked it straight away.

Our first choice for the reception venue was a restaurant that resembled a barn. We liked the informality of the place and it was in the country so it had a great rural feel to it. Unfortunately, the owner of the Barn died in a tragic accident so we were forced to seek out an alternative reception venue.

A lot of people recommended the Awapuni Racecourse as a potential reception venue. When we viewed the Racecourse we both loved it. There is an awesome view of the racecourse and it’s one big open space so everyone can see each other and everything can take place in the one space.

The Color Scheme and Decorations

My starting point in determining what colors to use for the wedding was that I knew I wanted a big bouquet of purely red roses! The reason for that is because I love the way the vibrancy of the red roses looks against the white dress. In the end, we didn’t have a color scheme as such. Instead, we wanted all the colors to look vibrant against the color red. We weren’t particularly keen on pastel colors so the color of the bridesmaids dresses were a vibrant blue, as they were also holding red roses, and the table linen and the invitations were black.

In terms of our invitations, they were on black card and there were a sequence of three black and white photos running across the cover. Underneath the photos were a narration of significant dates during our relationship such as the date of our first date, our first kiss and finally the date we would marry. The final date was highlighted in red and the invitation was sealed using a thin red ribbon which went around the invitation and was tied with a small bow on the cover. On the inside of the invitation, a black and white photo of Graham and I was on one half of the invitation, on the other half was the text and ¾ of the way down we included a tear off RSVP card. Our address was typed on the other side of the card (ie the back of the invitation) so guests could reply whether or not they could attend, then simply cut off the RSVP card, stick a postage stamp on the back and send it back to us.

With the table settings we used black table linen. We purchased small hat boxes from Spotlight and covered them with red fabric. The red hat box was then placed on the centre of the table and on top of the box we placed a brandy balloon glass, which had crystals sitting on the bottom of the glass and grass (which was like flax) weaved around the inside of the glass. The glasses were filled with water and floating candles placed on top. There were also red napkins and we placed small red tea light candles around the table.

In order to soften the look of the black table linen we hung white drapery and fairy lights from the ceiling. The drapery was placed just under the lights so that the lights shone through the drapery. We achieved exactly the look we were hoping for, soft and romantic.

We scooped up a couple of bargains when completing the decorations. The drapery for the ceiling, and the brandy glasses were both purchased off Trade Me for a great price.

The Bridesmaids

I had real difficulty deciding on who to ask to be my bridesmaid. I had originally thought for budget reasons that I would only have one bridesmaid, but that made things even more difficult. It was really important to me that I had a bridesmaid who lived close by and could help me with the planning. Unfortunately, my best friend was living overseas and my sister was also out of town. So, I turned to Jay-Jay from the Edge’s Morning Madhouse for advice. I regularly checked her website for inspiration because I thought she had a gorgeous wedding.

I ended up being called one morning by the Morning Madhouse and I explained my dilemma on air. Choice 1 was a friend who I had been good friends with for the last five years but whenever I raised the wedding planning with her she seemed a bit disinterested. Choice 2 was an old high school friend who I had lost contact with for several years. We had just come into contact again and she offered great advice whenever I discussed the wedding with her. I didn’t know who to pick, so it was put to the Edge listeners. Choice 1 received the most support and I knew in my gut that Choice 1 was the best pick. So I asked my friend Lorraine , who was Choice 1, to be the bridesmaid, and told her she had the support of the Edge listeners! As it turns out I was silly for thinking Lorraine was disinterested. She ended up being a great bridesmaid, all that I had hoped for.

After a bit more umming and aahing about the bridesmaid situation, I thought back to other significant moments in my life and realised that only one other person could relate to those moments because they had gone through them to, and that was my sister. I wanted my sister to also be part of this significant moment in my life so I asked her to be the second bridesmaid.

What the bridesmaids wore

I wanted the bridesmaids to look and feel glamorous on the day. I wanted them to feel special too and to stand out in their own right.

So, I decided I didn’t want to go with typical pastel, instead I chose a vibrant blue. A color which was inspired by Graham’s step-mother’s wedding dress. As mentioned previously, I also knew I wanted the bridesmaids to hold a bouquet red roses, as I was, so I wanted a vibrant color against which the roses would be set off.

I purchased Lorraine ’s dress from Staxs for a bargain $59! My sister’s dress had to be made as on the wedding day she was 5 months pregnant. Thankfully we were able to find a fabric that matched the unique color of Lorraine ’s dress.

Both wore long strapless dresses and their own shoes and jewellery. I wasn’t to fussy about those little details, as long as they were happy and comfortable!

The Groomsmen and What They Wore

Graham didn’t have nearly as much difficulty choosing his groomsmen as I did my bridesmaids. At the time when we thought we ‘d have a small bridal party of just one bridesmaid and one groomsman, Graham needed to decide between his best mate, who lived in Wellington, or my cousin who he is also good friends with.

In the end the dilemma was solved when we decided to extend our bridal party! The Groom and the Groomsmen wore black suits hired from Van Meer Suit Hire in Palmerston North. Under their jackets they wore silver vests over a white shirt and silver ties. The look was inspired by samples we had seen at various wedding expos!

The Brides’ Dress

I ended up purchasing my wedding dress overseas. Five months after becoming engaged, Graham and I went to the United States . Out of curiosity I browsed the internet for bridal stores in Seattle , where we were staying.

I ended up at the website of David’s Bridal in Seattle , and conveniently they placed images of all their dresses on their website, so you could pick out which dresses you would like to try before going to the store. I called to check if there was a charge involved with trying dresses, and there wasn’t, but I had to make an appointment to see a consultant who would assist me for an hour.

I arrived at the store to try on the dresses I had picked and meet my consultant. We went to the rack and pulled out the dresses I had seen and picked from the Internet. The consultant then looked at the dresses I‘d picked, looked at me, and then picked out four dresses from the rack which were completely different to the ones I had picked and which honestly at the time I thought we really not me. The consultant commented that the four dresses I had picked were very similar and that I should try different styles. She thought the ones she had picked for me would suit me. As we approached the changing room I was ready to prove her wrong with the beautiful dresses I had picked!

Trying on the dresses with the Consultant was fantastic. The one-on-one attention was great and she acted objectively. She was great and really patient as I ummed and aahed over every single dress. We had finally arrived at the dress which I was pretty sure was the one, which was one I had picked out. Then the Consultant insisted I try one of her choices. I told her I didn’t like it because I felt it was to busy with all the beading and a tad over the top. She convinced me to try it on and I ended up eating my words! The dress looked great, it was a perfect fit and at the sake of sounding a bit cheesy, it did make me feel like a princess! The consultant had picked out a style that suited me, she was right all along. The best thing I did was try on dresses of differing styles.

The dress was A-line shape and had beading across the top and bottom of the bodice. At the bottom of the full skirt was more beading, but the best part of the dress for me was the train. I liked its length and it has quite detailed beading on it.

After finally picking the dress, the Consultant asked me to stand in front of the large mirrors and close my eyes. She then asked me to envision walking down the aisle with all my friends and family present, and Graham at the end of the aisle looking completely in love with me. I was feeling a bit hesitant as she was adding a bunch of accessories to me while she spoke. When she was finished she asked me to open my open eyes...at which stage I almost screamed…I looked like an 80s Vegas bride! I had three veils on which stood to what looked like to be a meter high and I had a large sparkly tiara on. I asked her politely to take it all off as I didn’t like it. She replied that typically when Brides open their eyes they begin to cry. Unfortunately I was to concerned about looking as though I had just stepped out of an episode of Dallas to become so overwhelmed by emotion!

In the end I purchased my headpiece which was a simple silver sparkly headband and the veil which had little pearls throughout and came down to my hip. Just one veil would do me! I purchased my shoes back in NZ. I went to No1 shoe warehouse and purchased some white heels, and at the same time purchased some cute white flats I could change into at the reception. That turned out to be a sensible idea as my feet began to ache from to much dancing at the reception! In terms of jewellery, Graham’s mother gave me a pearl necklace she had been given on her wedding day. When I tried it on it looked lovely but I thought it’d look even better if it sat a bit higher, so we went to the jeweller who removed a few pearls from the necklace and made them into earrings, they looked great.

The Wedding

Less than a year later after my fun dress buying experience, we were married. The night before Graham stayed at his dad’s and I stayed at our place. Each of us spent our last night as “singles” with family and close friends.

On the morning of the wedding, I went to the gym. Crazy I know, but I wanted to feel my best, and it helped to relieve some of the anxiety as I sweated it out on the treadmill.

Thankfully we had been blessed with a sunny day. It had rained the day before but I had been reassured by friends that the weather forecast was great for the day, and it was.

After a quick shower and a mad panic looking for my headpiece, my bridesmaid Lorraine and I met my younger sister at the hair salon. I knew exactly how I wanted our hair to look. Neither my bridesmaids nor myself wear a lot of makeup nor are we too fussy with our hair. So I wanted us look natural, like ourselves and most of all I wanted us to be comfortable. I wanted to distinguish myself from them somehow so I chose to wear my hair down with loose curls and both bridesmaids had their hair pulled back. The team at the salon were great, they were awesome at making us feel relaxed and the little extras such as nibbles and bubbly really rounded off the fun girly experience.

After getting our hair done, my bridesmaids and I went back to a nearby hotel to get ready. There we met up with my mum and younger sister who was also a flower girl. The woman who was doing our makeup arrived shortly after and as she did my sister’s makeup I furiously wrote mine and Graham’s speech for the reception. We decided that instead of Graham doing a speech on his own, we would do one together.

After our makeup was all done we sat around and chatted, and were entertained by my crazy 4 year old sister who was desperate to put on her dress. Once the photographer arrived we started getting dressed, and the photographer took a few shots of us getting ready. We were then ready to head for the church. I was going to ride in Graham’s grandfather’s vintage car with my step-dad. We chose the vintage car as the bridal car as it had been used to transport Graham’s mum and all his aunties to their weddings. The bridesmaids rode in my boss’s Jeep, only because I have a thing for trucks, preferably big American trucks!

Music was playing at the church while the guests awaited my and the bridesmaids arrival. Graham and the groomsmen arrived shortly before the beginning of the ceremony in Graham’s father silver Cadillac.

I walked down the aisle to the traditional bridal march. It was pretty nerve wracking but I was reassured by everyone’s smiles on their faces. My best friend Kim, and Graham’s step-sister did readings at the ceremony and our mothers were the witnesses as we signed the marriage licence. The celebrant was fantastic, she added a bit of humor to the ceremony which clamed everyone’s nerves.

My favorite part of the ceremony was definitely the personal bits Graham and I wrote for each other. We wanted to say something to each other where we weren’t being prompted by the celebrant, but just came from us. Also, we didn’t want to know what the other was going to say so that we’d receive a nice surprise on the day.

That was the most emotional part of the day. I’m pretty sure there wasn’t a dry eye in the house as Graham and I told each other why we loved each other. For me, it was all the little things such as the way he makes the bed every night, the way he lets me choose the music whenever we travel anywhere and how he always leaves me the last piece of whatever food we may be sharing. For Graham, it was that I was not afraid to be a goof around him and that not only did he love what kind of person I am and was becoming but also what kind of person I was making of him.

A further nice surprise was that as we walked out of the church, U2’s Beautiful Day was playing and the DJ had set his bubble machine going, so as we walked out of the church we walked into a sea of bubbles, it was very cute!

After the ceremony the bridal party went to get their pictures taken at a nearby property. We had lots of fun, and one of the things I love about our photos are that we all look relaxed and comfortable, which is a real testament to our photographer who made us all feel at ease. Graham’s dad, who also came along as he was driving one of the vehicle’s thoughtfully had made up a hamper full of yummy goodies so we were all able to fend off those hunger pains we were experiencing as we had been to nervous to eat previously.

We then made our way to the Reception venue and when we arrived, each of us were introduced by the MC who was my uncle Danny. We then proceeded to mingle with the guests and get photos taken with every table.

We then sat down for dinner which was a buffet. The bridal party was served at their table, and everyone was really happy with the food. The Racecourse did an awesome job and the staff were great to deal with too. In between dinner and dessert, we had the speeches. Graham and I, Graham’s dad, my parents, the best man and my bridesmaid Lorraine together with my friend Megan all did speeches. They were all great and while some made everyone laugh there were others which were very sentimental and brought a tear to the eye.

In terms of our wedding cake, we decided on something simple, just two layers with red ribbon dividing each layer and more red ribbon around the bottom of the cake. The bottom tier was made of chocolate and was made by Graham’s step-mother. The top tier was a fruit cake, made by Graham’s mum. The cakes were iced by a work friend of Grahams’. On top of the cake sat a doll which held special significance for Graham and his family. The doll had been used to sit on the wedding cakes of Graham’s great-great grandparents in 1912 and had sat on every wedding cake for the family since then.

For our first dance Graham had thought it would be a nice to dance to a Spanish song in recognition of my Chilean culture. We ended up choosing a song which I heard and loved while we were in the USA. We also thought it was nice that it was a song that reminded us of another great time in our relationship, our first overseas holiday! The only problem was that the song we chose has a salsa beat to it in the chorus and Graham really doesn’t dance. So a few weeks before the wedding our lessons started, and I was the teacher! I really enjoyed it, although at times it did test both of our patience! On the night, Graham did an awesome job and everyone was completely shocked at the moves he unleashed. Little did our guests know that Graham had a little surprise of his own for them, everyone, especially the teacher, were really proud.

We then partied for the rest of the night, the DJ playing a mix of both Spanish and English music. Everyone had a great time.

At 12.30am Graham and I retreated to the motel I had got ready at. Apparently the party continued until 2.30am.

The next day most people were a little worse for wear at a BBQ Graham’s dad and step-mother hosted at their home. It was really nice to chat to everyone about the previous day at the BBQ.

After the BBQ Graham and I headed home to pack as were setting off to Rarotonga for our honeymoon the next day, where we had another great time.

It’s been great re-living one of our happiest days ever. While at times during the planning things got a bit stressful and overwhelming, none of those things mattered at the end of the day. As I had been told several times, it did all turn out great on the day.